Why Does It Matter?
The Success or Failure Quotient
Do you need a high EQ for success? Let’s take a look and see why emotional Intelligence is important for your personal and business life.
For example, imagine that it is late at night. You and a small team of associates are in the midst of a project. You feel tired and hungry and the deadline is tomorrow at 8 a.m. Suddenly, a team member says, “This isn’t going to work!”
Immediately, you feel the blood rising to your face. Without thinking, angry words spew out of your mouth, “What do you mean, ‘It isn’t going to work?’ What are you talking about? We’re going to make it work!” Within minutes, you and the others are in the midst of a full-fledged, time-wasting argument. What happened to your Emotional Intelligence?
Do Your Emotions Control You?
Emotions are unpredictable, and yet some people seem able to manage their emotions. As a result, they can stay calm in various stressful situations. These same people may not have super high IQs, but they have amazing social skills. Above all, people with a high EQ relate to other people easily, and their personality is dynamic and motivated.
Consequently, people with an optimistic attitude can be very successful in their personal and business lives. These individuals have what is called a high Emotional Intelligence Quotient, a high EQ.
It is obvious that in our stressful, modern world, a high EQ may actually be more beneficial for achievement than a high IQ. Researchers have shown that how we handle stressful events in our life affects our personal relationships and our work. Additionally, a high EQ determines our ability to enjoy life and achieve our goals.
What Determines EQ?
Our Emotional Intelligence is measured by how well we monitor our own and other people’s emotions. And as a result, how we respond to those emotions appropriately. EQ is our ability to use this emotional information to guide our thinking and behavior. Above all, we learn to focus on our thoughts and consider alternatives before activating our emotions. Thus, we can more easily navigate our social environment.
If your EQ could use some improvement, there are ways to increase and enhance your ability to understand your emotional patterns and those of others. As a result, you can establish new habits to increase your understanding of your emotional state of being and be aware of the emotional well-being of others.
Five Main Skills Can Help You Raise Your EQ
1. Develop Self-Awareness
Become more aware of your emotions, strengths, and weaknesses.
Refine your values and goals and recognize their impact on others. Take the time to relax, focus, spend time in nature, exercise, and reflect upon who you are to add to your Emotional Intelligence.
As we move through life, many of us experience hurtful and emotional upsets, which we may have hidden away in our unconscious. This hidden emotional inventory often reveals itself in our attacks and judgments upon others. Therefore, it is very important to ask ourselves, “Why are another person’s actions, attitudes, and behaviors so upsetting to us?” As a result of taking stock of our own emotional triggers, we can learn to manage our emotions more effectively.
2. Drop the Blame Game
Develop more empathy and compassion for others.
It is very easy to be critical of authority figures, our bosses, teachers, and family members. Blaming others for our problems can provide a way to release our emotional reservoir of pent-up anger and fear. Evidently, being critical is taking a shortcut around a problem, rather than seeking a more creative solution.
By avoiding the blame game, we must face what we have done or have not done to create an obstacle in our lives. You cannot find a solution at the level of the problem. You need to lift your awareness to a higher view to see how you can change your behavior and use positive emotions to clear your mind and release confusion.
3. Avoid Emotional Escapism
Learn to face your emotions, feel them, and let them go.
How often do we find ourselves feeling slightly depressed or emotionally flat? In many instances, we are attempting to do what you might describe as “emotional damage control.” Consequently, we use alternatives and substitutions, such as feel-good behaviors, hoping to overcome feelings of inadequacy. Specifically, these behaviors could include overeating, using alcohol or drugs, as well as indulging in shopping to acquire objects which we believe will boost our emotions. We often think that a shiny new car, an expensive bracelet, or a new pair of shoes will solve our problems for the moment. These are only substitutes or temporary fixes.
4. Learn Self-Regulation
Develop the ability to redirect and limit your disruptive emotions and impulses and adapt to changing circumstances.
You need to find the courage during an argument to say, “I understand your position, and I believe you feel you are right.” With these words, you can at least try to end the confrontation. Learn to let the upset go and save yourself and others from the emotional and/or physical pain that can result from saying words that you may wish were never said.
5. Practice Emotional Optimism
Activate mental projections of seeing yourself in an improving relationship in your personal and business life.
By imagining yourself at ease and at peace, you can create a new energy template. For example, positive mental projections will provide a platform for you to establish desirable emotions within you. Those pleasant feelings and emotions will create an energy field that flows in all directions and is felt and absorbed by everyone around you. People who exhibit optimism are called charismatic. As a result, their personal magnetism often leads to becoming highly successful and able to serve as inspiring leaders, mentors, and teachers.
You Can Dramatically Increase Your Emotional Quotient!
Your success or failure can depend upon many factors. Although you can increase your IQ to a certain extent, unfortunately, a high IQ will not change your ability to interact with others.
However, you can dramatically increase your Emotional Quotient (EQ) by practicing new Emotional Intelligence behavior. Therefore, you will enhance your social skills and become far more dynamic and effective in all aspects of your life.
Verlaine Crawford is an Author, Transformational Coach, and Inspirational Speaker. She was invited to teach personal growth and spiritual awareness worldwide. She is the author of four best-selling books and publisher of two by John Teressi: See Books to Enhance Your Life. Verlaine’s bio click here.
To set up a fifteen-minute chat, email VerlaineC@CreativeLifeAdventures.com.
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